Current

Frenemies

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           The legal field is sometimes a very small one. If you are a member of a small local bar, it is inevitable that you form friendships and close associations with other attorneys within that group. Sometimes those relationships grow very close to our hearts, and we have a genuine like for those other attorneys with which we practice. However, what if you find yourself on the opposing side of a good friend? Of course, this cannot be uncommon. Especially if you are a part of a very small local bar. How does that friendship affect your representation, if at all? How does the representation affect the friendship? How do we maneuver such an issue while maintaining both the professional necessities of the representation but also the main tenants of the friendship?

            Such a task is a perilous one because our duty is to be zealous advocates for our clients. However, I have always interpreted that zealousness to be tempered with professionalism, honesty, and credibility.  Even in the law, just because you CAN do something doesn’t mean that you always should. That saying has immense application when you are dealing with a friend on the other side.

            There was one notable example of this for me when I was trying an especially contentious and highly emotional sexual assault trial with a dear friend and colleague. Throughout the case up until trial, we had managed to be cordial and friendly. However, when we got into trial, it was game time for both of us. We filed motions, objected vociferously and argued passionately for our respective positions. It was a tough case that required us to be in trial for weeks. Through it, I was concerned that I may have been too aggressive in one objection, or made a move that my colleague felt was unfair. But, then on one day of trial, the Court asked us to approach. As the Court first attended to something the clerk said, my colleague and friend leaned over and whispered to me “Are you as exhausted as I am?” My heart lifted and I responded “Oh, my goodness, I am about to drop!” That one small gesture made me realize that no matter how hard we fought one another in trial on opposing sides, we had maintained our friendship, and he knew that all that was done and said was due to our professional responsibility and respect for the craft. In the end, I never took personally anything my friend said or did during that trial. In fact, there was a time or two that I said to myself in response to something “Touche, friend. Touche!” I think it’s because we went into such an arduous task with immense respect for one another and we both kept that at the forefront of our minds throughout.

            In my practice, however, I have seen a lot of practitioners forget that. Or they never knew it to begin with. I have seen people that were seemingly friends for years, in one case, break up their friendship. One case? Cases come and go, but true friendships are not so plentiful. It is quite probable that such an instance occurs when the two practitioners were not really friends in the traditional sense. Because, if so, how could one case do so much damage? Or perhaps the two didn’t really know one another like they thought? I think that in such cases, one or both people lose perspective. While we must be zealous advocates for our clients, we also have to maintain our credibility and respect for ourselves. Some practitioners feel that it is their professional duty to win at all costs. That is a dangerous tenent by which to live if you are an attorney. Those lawyers, who ascribe to that philosophy usually end up disbarred or in jail. Because they have no boundary by which to operate and no shame or pride with which to refer. It is those lawyers who seem to toss out their longstanding friendships at the drop of a hat when they are faced with opposing counsel that are also their friends (or supposed friends).

            Let’s vote not to do that, shall we? Most lawyers I know say that it is much easier and better for the client when the two lawyers get along. Costs go down because there is inevitably less fighting about the smallest things. Attorneys who are in good standing with one another are apt to first pick up the phone than file a Motion.

     So on this Thanksgiving Eve, let’s all hold lawyer hands with our friends and give thanks for those friendships and the practice all at the same time. 

*Image Credit: 7823468 © Zbieg2001 | Dreamstime.com

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