I find that my day is filled with phrases that I have to repeat as a part of my lawyering life. In my office, I like to keep my door open (to the chagrin of my partner and our office mates; my voice carries), but in doing that I hear my partner and office mate say some of the same phrases that I have said. These are the same phrases that I have had to pull out of my lawyer ass often in the completion of my work as an attorney.

            So, I wanted to make a list of all these phrases, and my interpretation of them. These phrases have been useful and of great utility to me as I endeavor to work as an attorney working directly with clients.

#1: Now, we talked about this…

• I find that people either don’t listen, or their memories need re-tuning. Uttering this phrase means trying to reiterate to whom I am speaking that I have spoken to them about this more than once, and that this time I really need for them to hear what the fuck I am saying. I am also trying to emphasize that it is not fruitful nor productive for me to continue to reiterate this point without them hearing what I am saying. It is also costing them more money, unnecessarily.

#2: Let’s talk about why you made that decision…

• This is my attempt to try and make the person think about why they made the decision they made; because I am about to tell them how bad that decision was. This is me trying to not say “What in the hell were you thinking? Why did you think that was a good idea??” I want my clients to get better. I want them to get out of the pickle they have oftentimes got themselves into (hence why they are coming to see me). I find that if most people just stopped for 5 seconds, just 5 seconds before they make certain decisions, their positions would be unequivocally better. So, I start by asking them what was going through their head when they made the decision. It also helps me truly understand that thinking to check myself before I launch into telling them why that was such a bad idea.

#3: One of the things I think is important to think about is….

• I say this when someone tells me what they really want to do or say and I am preparing them to hear from me that it is not a good idea. This is where I make sure that I have extolled to them my advice and also document it as well. I find this is more palatable for certain headstrong people to hear as opposed to “I wouldn’t do that. You need to do ….”.

#4: I advise that you…

• This is a big one. I don’t always pull this one out early on in my conversations with clients. I usually make a point to tell clients specifically what I am advising when they have a history of not listening to what I advise them. When I specifically demarcate that I am advising them and the next words out of my mouth are actual advice, it is a clear indication to the client as well as me that I am giving them this specific advice and directive. So, when things go to shit, I can specifically point to this phrase as my extolling to them the advice they chose not to follow.